Excessive Adverbs

September 22nd, 2011

Remember the Police Academy movies in which Commandant Loussard prefaced everything he said with ”very very very”? Comical. We laughed, and with good reason. Very is an adverb and it’s tempting to overuse it. An adverb denotes when, where, how, or how much and can modify an adjective. Typically (Yep! Typically is an adverb) it ends in an -ly. Other common adverbs are often, too, only, many, and soon. That’s hardly a comprehensive list, but this isn’t an adverb lesson; it’s a style lesson.

Consider these two sentences:

Weak: If you repeatedly use too many adverbs too many times, your writing is very amateurish and tiresome to read.

Strong: Overuse of adverbs weakens your writing.

When editing your writing, do an adverb search. First, examine -ly words to decide if you need them or if the sentence can be worded a different way. Why? Those -ly words can be a symptom of passive writing, when you feed information you want the readers to know, robbing them of experiencing it for themselves. You risk losing your reader with passive writing.

Example:

Weak: “Get out,” she said angrily. “You’ve done enough!”

Strong: “Get out.” She stomped her foot, her face red with rage. “You’ve done enough.”

Edit a second time for other adverbs. Read the sentence without them to see if they’re necessary. Be brutal. Less is more.

You will need the occasional adverb, but use it sparingly. Happy writing!

The Comma Splice

September 15th, 2011

I see it in blogs, in books, even in the newspaper–the comma splice. It’s a grammar infraction worthy of a grammar cop citation, so don’t be a guilty party.

To be sure you know your grammar “rights,” I’ll give a few examples of comma splices:

He had drunk enough coffee to stay awake for a week, he returned to the office.

He didn’t know what she meant, he had no intention of leaving until he did.

She finished shopping, she headed home.

The book was published, there was nothing he could do about it now.

They had plowed the fields, they had planted the seeds.

These examples show two independent clauses connected (spliced) by a comma only. Either separate them into two sentences or add a conjunction. The following are correct:

He had drunk enough coffee to stay awake for a week, so he returned to the office.

He didn’t know what she meant, and he had no intention of leaving until he did.

She finished shopping, then she headed home.

The book was published. There was nothing he could do about it now.

They had plowed the fields, and they had planted the seeds.

Use commas judiciously and sparingly, and you’ll steer clear of the grammar cop. :-)

Capital Punishment ☺

September 8th, 2011
An encore post from two years ago, by request.

Spelling can be such a pain in the behind, especially for writers.  We’re bright enough to realize we can’t trust our spell checking programs because of homophones or similarly spelled words.  We have dictionaries for tricky words, and we can program our auto-correct features to catch habitually misspelled words.  But what about trademarked names, proper names, and other names requiring capitalizing?

After going through edits of my books, I learned the rules aren’t cut and dried.  For instance, while Internet is capitalized, google used as a verb is not.  Don’t ask why; I don’t know.  According to my editor, that’s Google’s decision.  Perhaps they like their trademarked word being generic for online search engines.

Other everyday items we don’t think about as proper names but are trademarked include Windbreaker, Dumpster, Formica, Jaws of Life, Hula Hoop, Kleenex, Coke, and Jeep. It’s very important that you respect a company’s brand name; they’ve spent thousands and thousands of dollars to register and advertise it.

Back by popular demand, here is the Grammar Cop’s quick reference for capitalization:
CAPITALIZE:

  • A person’s name.
  • A person’s title when it precedes the name.
  • Days of the week, months of the year.
  • Special days, holidays.
  • Organizations and abbreviations of organizations.
  • Historical periods, documents, and events.
  • Nationality, race, or language.
  • Personification of objects or abstract concepts.
  • First word of a statement.
  • When used as part of a proper name: lake, county, high school, college, river, street, park, country, company, institution, etc. (Ohio River, the river)
  • A noun identifying a family member when used as a name. (Mom, your mom)
  • Geographical locations-specific. (The West, out west)
  • References to the Diety.
  • The pronoun “I.”
  • Acronyms (AT&T, URL)
  • In a title, all words except prepositions, articles, and conjunctions of four letters or less (Days of Thunder) unless it’s the first word. (The Runaway Bride)
  • Subjects studied that are specific titles (Composition 101, meteorology, American History 202, biology)
DON’T CAPITALIZE:

  • Points on a compass or direction.
  • Seasons of the year.
  • Pronouns other than “I” unless at the start of a sentence or part of a title.
EXAMPLES:
We watched West Wing before heading down south.
Independence Day falls on a Wednesday this year, according to my mother.
Mother is always right about summer holidays.
Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, and best wishes for the new year.

As always, you should consult a dictionary or grammar or style reference when in doubt.  Happy writing!

Politically Correct, Grammatically Incorrect!

September 1st, 2011

How many times do you see or hear this glaring grammar error?

Each contestant took their seat.

Fifty years ago, it would have read Each contestant took his seat, regardless of the candidate’s gender, because male pronouns took priority in a mixed gender situation. Equal rights changed the rules. Since there is no singular possessive pronoun in the English language that is gender-neutral, people started using their.

It’s wrong! Thou shalt not use a plural pronoun with a singular antecedant!

So what are your alternatives to a male pronoun when the gender is unknown or mixed?

  • Alternate his and her. In a lengthy document, switch gender in the next paragraph. Switching repeatedly in the same sentence or paragraph is jarring to the reader.
  • Reword to avoid the pronoun.
  • Use his/her. This works fine in legalese, but don’t try it in a romance novel.
  • Change your antecedent to plural and use the plural pronoun (The contestants took their seats).

Whatever you opt to write or say, remember to maintain agreement between the pronoun and antecedent.